Like a lightning bolt, your heart will blow.

Tuesday, July 28, 2009

I need to vent again.

So bottled up inside.

How come I have to feel this way? Its like getting poked in the eye even without actually doing.

You know like when you're watching tv and someone gets stab you go "ough". Ya thats how i feel right now.

GOSH

I dont know if im dumb or not but GAAAAH! Its horribly irritating every nerve in me.

I've been seeing that sentence for a very VERY long time and suddenly now I'm wondering, what if now its mean't for me too?

GEEES Im not having mood swings. I just feel so vulnerable.

And it is finally clear to me now, cause i know what they mean when they say the tighter you hold the sand, the more they spill out.

I'm still keeping you close but Im letting go. I'll watch and if you fall, I'll let you pick yourself up cause that is my purpose here. =) There. Something positive. Now it doesnt seem so bad after all.

before i go. Heres alittle note to you appupa

Dont worry old man! Come wha may, we'll always be there with you okay!
LOVE YOU! <3

Monday, July 27, 2009

what do you do when you want to keep them close but you cant't cause you're simply helpless.

I suddeny feel like a fool. Like all my words just fall onto deaf ears.

Dont my words mean anything? or at least dont I mean anything?

How come I care so much for people but always feel like an idiot after that?

I cant pretend to be oblivious simply because I care too much.

I'm going mad thinking about this too much.

I dont want to take a step back but I dont want to be too close for comfort either.

I think its only fair that I'm appreciated and I shouldn't feel this way because its not right.

GAAAAAAH! I should just shoot myself because SO many times I have thought to myself, if only I could just get knocked out and dont wake up for several months and then maybe people would realise what I am worth and then I wouldn't be taken for granted again.

This doesnt make me suicidal please. I value life too much =)

Im just so down I need to get it out. Who wants to hear me out?

I just saw everyone run off. see no one wants to listen. :(

p.s IM NOT EMO!

Thursday, July 23, 2009

Its today again.

Today we mourn for you.

Today we celebrate that you're in a better place

Today we reflect on how you have impacted us in everyway

Today we think back on things we should have done but didnt

Today we'll miss you more than usual

Today 3 years ago you left us all but today 3 years on, you're still here in all our hearts.

Twinkle twinkle little star, how I wonder what you are?

up above the world so high, like a diamond in the sky

Twinkle twinkle little star thank you for your tiny spark

he who could not see which way to go if you did not twinkle so

twinkle twinkle little star, how I wonder what you are.

Iloveyou ammuma!

Thursday, July 16, 2009

Bless this soul oh Lord I pray, keep it safe by night and day.

Tuesday, July 14, 2009

if its not me its them

if its not them its me.

I choose to think its them because I've been my usual me throughout.

Last yr went well so why this sem?

conclusion: its not me=)

Maybe its just to show me the road to success is not always smooth.

4 more weeks before I can kick them all good bye. The tears of joy I will shed will cause a hurricane and flash floods everywhere. Countdown to the 24th of Aug people and take the necessary precautions needed.

I can count the time I spent talking in class through out the semester would only add up to 1 hr worth of talk time. Believe it or not,

I've never been this agitated before and I've never cursed this much.

If the point of my finger could kill. They did all be dead flat on the ground by now.

Ugh! I feel a certain kind of violence building up inside me. Like wind up toys, I want to pull off their winds one by one and dispose them to be burnt and never be produced ever again.

After the storm comes the rainbow and the warm sunshine.

Monday, July 13, 2009

we dont have to meet everyday
neither do we have to speak everyday

but whenever or wherever we meet, its like all walls are torn down and the bridge just forms all over again.

Its the people you least expect, that makes your heart fuzzy and warm because you know you're appreciated and loved.

You just know when its genunine and when its not.
Thats the blessing of the sixth sense.

Like my previous post, the smallest gestures mean the biggest things.
Today a simple "kiss" emoticon from a friend i least expected, made me smile. Someone remembered me. That means I'm special =)

Sunday, July 12, 2009

We choose what bothers us.
We choose what makes us happy.
We choose who stays in our lives and who doesnt.
We choose who stays close to the heart and who away.
We choose what we like to eat and what we dont.

We choose who we want to be and what we want to do!

Thursday, July 09, 2009

Sometimes words arent necessary to express our feeling and emotions.
Over the years, on my journey home from my sec school, the bus would stop at Balestier Sec, and suddenly the once peaceful bus becomes a loaded boom box with all the students yacking away. But admist all the hustle and bustle, there stands a group of either mute, deaf or even both, students deep in conversation and with the same level of excitement as the other normal kids. I used to watch them and smile. What do they lack? Not being able to hear and speak? But they've been blessed because they can do something many of us are not able to.

HAHA Im drifting from my purpose of this post.

On the 23rd floor directly below my house, there is this chinese guy who is deaf and mute and for many years, everything he sees us, his face lights up and his smile is practically from one ear to the other. He mouths a "hi" in the most enthusiastic manner, its almost as if he's saying it. Oh and its always accompanied with a big wave. SO genuine, it warms the heart and automatcially wipes of any doubts you might have about his genuinity.

I look forward to bumping into him because it doesnt matter if you're walking infront of him, or behind him anywhere also he'll make it a point to acknowledge and it leaves me all smiley and warm.
A sulky journey home last night was brought to a smile when I was dragging my feet home and he was infront of me. He took two turns to realise it was me and waved with that ever so big smile. Automatically I felt so warm.

See, who needs words? Sometimes is the smallest gestures that make a big difference. A simple pat on the back, a wave, or a smile could just make someone's day. Infact I think its worth more than words.

So the next time you meet eye to eye with a stranger just smile. You could brighten his/her day and that way, you would have made a little difference in his day or even life =)

Yeap!
LOVES

Monday, July 06, 2009

When the weather is right, I'm out in school! thats called BAD LUCK!

I miss erika!
I miss those days during secondary school, where we would head to the esplande and have our moments.

We're in the same school but time doesnt permit us to meet.

She hardly comes for lunch and stays back EVERYDAY!

Erika dear erika... your bestfriend misses you!
I'm having withdrawal symptoms. HAHAHA

Its different during holidays.
we could survive the whole holidays without meeting up.

The value of friendship grows with us.

The older we get, the more we value friendship.

Many people have come but most leave..... only some stay and thats enough for me because the important ones matter to me most =))

DNP has been cooking for their bob succesfully for the past 3 weeks and its been a

success. lets hope it goes on! keep it up BOBBERS =)

Friday, July 03, 2009

When you think the road is going no where and you almost gave up everything.

I wish I was home now sprawled on my bed crooning away to old songs with my packet of Cheetos!

but NO! Im stuck here in school cracking my head about voltage divider bia circuits and amplifiers.

HORRIBLE!

The new faci isn't helping. I liked my original one cause she was really really nice.
This whole week has been rather slack though. Maybe cause next week its gonna be a wholw new level.
PROBLEM 10 is next week which means 6 more weeks with this class! HALLELUJAH!
I've never been so much happier to leave my class.

10 weeks has passed.

I've learnt to ignore and simply be oblivious to my surrounding because I know
outside this classroom, life is WAY much better, simply because for 1, I've got my my bestfriend who will stickby me through thick and thin, my friends who accept and like me the way I am. And ofcourse last but no least, my home where even though it might not always be the best place to be, its the safest place for me because its just me and me and ME =)

I've got nothing to prove to this people because I'm working towards MY diploma to get MY degree and to get MY job. I'm building MY own future and these people are merely passer bys. Those whom IF i remember, I will look back and go "oh yea whatever"

WOO I'm feeling SO good right now!

ITS THE WEEKEND and thats the sliver lining

Let the weekend move by slowly.
Let it take its time to embrace every eager soul who awaited it.
Let is make every kid happy THEN
Let Monday take over and ruin us all again! HAHAHAHAHA

Im good! not bad! hahaha

Anyways I'll stop for now.
Tatas!

Might sound crazy but it aint no lie baby BYE BYE BYE!

NEW YORK HERE I COME!

oh John Abraham is LOVE!
I got my glasses in time. Now I can see him all clear. AWESOME =)


Nisha is my name I'm fun and my laughter makes the world go round =). Create a playlist at MixPod.com February 2005 March 2005 April 2005 May 2005 June 2005 July 2005 August 2005 September 2005 October 2005 December 2005 January 2007 February 2007 March 2007 April 2007 May 2007 June 2007 July 2007 August 2007 September 2007 October 2007 November 2007 December 2007 January 2008 February 2008 March 2008 April 2008 May 2008 June 2008 July 2008 August 2008 September 2008 October 2008 November 2008 December 2008 January 2009 February 2009 March 2009 April 2009 May 2009 June 2009 July 2009 August 2009 September 2009 October 2009 November 2009 January 2010 February 2010 March 2010 April 2010 May 2010 June 2010 July 2010 August 2010 September 2010 October 2010 November 2010 January 2011 March 2011 May 2011 Bituwin - template Dementee - image Words from Before It's Too Late by Goo Goo Dolls.	Tuesday, July 28, 2009 I need to vent again. So bottled up inside. How come I have to feel this way? Its like getting poked in the eye even without actually doing. You know like when you're watching tv and someone gets stab you go "ough". Ya thats how i feel right now. GOSH I dont know if im dumb or not but GAAAAH! Its horribly irritating every nerve in me. I've been seeing that sentence for a very VERY long time and suddenly now I'm wondering, what if now its mean't for me too? GEEES Im not having mood swings. I just feel so vulnerable. And it is finally clear to me now, cause i know what they mean when they say the tighter you hold the sand, the more they spill out. I'm still keeping you close but Im letting go. I'll watch and if you fall, I'll let you pick yourself up cause that is my purpose here. =) There. Something positive. Now it doesnt seem so bad after all. before i go. Heres alittle note to you appupa Dont worry old man! Come wha may, we'll always be there with you okay! LOVE YOU! <3 · Monday, July 27, 2009 what do you do when you want to keep them close but you cant't cause you're simply helpless. I suddeny feel like a fool. Like all my words just fall onto deaf ears. Dont my words mean anything? or at least dont I mean anything? How come I care so much for people but always feel like an idiot after that? I cant pretend to be oblivious simply because I care too much. I'm going mad thinking about this too much. I dont want to take a step back but I dont want to be too close for comfort either. I think its only fair that I'm appreciated and I shouldn't feel this way because its not right. GAAAAAAH! I should just shoot myself because SO many times I have thought to myself, if only I could just get knocked out and dont wake up for several months and then maybe people would realise what I am worth and then I wouldn't be taken for granted again. This doesnt make me suicidal please. I value life too much =) Im just so down I need to get it out. Who wants to hear me out? I just saw everyone run off. see no one wants to listen. :( p.s IM NOT EMO! · Thursday, July 23, 2009 Its today again. Today we mourn for you. Today we celebrate that you're in a better place Today we reflect on how you have impacted us in everyway Today we think back on things we should have done but didnt Today we'll miss you more than usual Today 3 years ago you left us all but today 3 years on, you're still here in all our hearts. Twinkle twinkle little star, how I wonder what you are? up above the world so high, like a diamond in the sky Twinkle twinkle little star thank you for your tiny spark he who could not see which way to go if you did not twinkle so twinkle twinkle little star, how I wonder what you are. Iloveyou ammuma! · Thursday, July 16, 2009 Bless this soul oh Lord I pray, keep it safe by night and day. · Tuesday, July 14, 2009 if its not me its them if its not them its me. I choose to think its them because I've been my usual me throughout. Last yr went well so why this sem? conclusion: its not me=) Maybe its just to show me the road to success is not always smooth. 4 more weeks before I can kick them all good bye. The tears of joy I will shed will cause a hurricane and flash floods everywhere. Countdown to the 24th of Aug people and take the necessary precautions needed. I can count the time I spent talking in class through out the semester would only add up to 1 hr worth of talk time. Believe it or not, I've never been this agitated before and I've never cursed this much. If the point of my finger could kill. They did all be dead flat on the ground by now. Ugh! I feel a certain kind of violence building up inside me. Like wind up toys, I want to pull off their winds one by one and dispose them to be burnt and never be produced ever again. After the storm comes the rainbow and the warm sunshine. · Monday, July 13, 2009 we dont have to meet everyday neither do we have to speak everyday but whenever or wherever we meet, its like all walls are torn down and the bridge just forms all over again. Its the people you least expect, that makes your heart fuzzy and warm because you know you're appreciated and loved. You just know when its genunine and when its not. Thats the blessing of the sixth sense. Like my previous post, the smallest gestures mean the biggest things. Today a simple "kiss" emoticon from a friend i least expected, made me smile. Someone remembered me. That means I'm special =) · Sunday, July 12, 2009 We choose what bothers us. We choose what makes us happy. We choose who stays in our lives and who doesnt. We choose who stays close to the heart and who away. We choose what we like to eat and what we dont. We choose who we want to be and what we want to do! · Thursday, July 09, 2009 Sometimes words arent necessary to express our feeling and emotions. Over the years, on my journey home from my sec school, the bus would stop at Balestier Sec, and suddenly the once peaceful bus becomes a loaded boom box with all the students yacking away. But admist all the hustle and bustle, there stands a group of either mute, deaf or even both, students deep in conversation and with the same level of excitement as the other normal kids. I used to watch them and smile. What do they lack? Not being able to hear and speak? But they've been blessed because they can do something many of us are not able to. HAHA Im drifting from my purpose of this post. On the 23rd floor directly below my house, there is this chinese guy who is deaf and mute and for many years, everything he sees us, his face lights up and his smile is practically from one ear to the other. He mouths a "hi" in the most enthusiastic manner, its almost as if he's saying it. Oh and its always accompanied with a big wave. SO genuine, it warms the heart and automatcially wipes of any doubts you might have about his genuinity. I look forward to bumping into him because it doesnt matter if you're walking infront of him, or behind him anywhere also he'll make it a point to acknowledge and it leaves me all smiley and warm. A sulky journey home last night was brought to a smile when I was dragging my feet home and he was infront of me. He took two turns to realise it was me and waved with that ever so big smile. Automatically I felt so warm. See, who needs words? Sometimes is the smallest gestures that make a big difference. A simple pat on the back, a wave, or a smile could just make someone's day. Infact I think its worth more than words. So the next time you meet eye to eye with a stranger just smile. You could brighten his/her day and that way, you would have made a little difference in his day or even life =) Yeap! LOVES · Monday, July 06, 2009 When the weather is right, I'm out in school! thats called BAD LUCK! I miss erika! I miss those days during secondary school, where we would head to the esplande and have our moments. We're in the same school but time doesnt permit us to meet. She hardly comes for lunch and stays back EVERYDAY! Erika dear erika... your bestfriend misses you! I'm having withdrawal symptoms. HAHAHA Its different during holidays. we could survive the whole holidays without meeting up. The value of friendship grows with us. The older we get, the more we value friendship. Many people have come but most leave..... only some stay and thats enough for me because the important ones matter to me most =)) DNP has been cooking for their bob succesfully for the past 3 weeks and its been a success. lets hope it goes on! keep it up BOBBERS =) · Friday, July 03, 2009 When you think the road is going no where and you almost gave up everything. I wish I was home now sprawled on my bed crooning away to old songs with my packet of Cheetos! but NO! Im stuck here in school cracking my head about voltage divider bia circuits and amplifiers. HORRIBLE! The new faci isn't helping. I liked my original one cause she was really really nice. This whole week has been rather slack though. Maybe cause next week its gonna be a wholw new level. PROBLEM 10 is next week which means 6 more weeks with this class! HALLELUJAH! I've never been so much happier to leave my class. 10 weeks has passed. I've learnt to ignore and simply be oblivious to my surrounding because I know outside this classroom, life is WAY much better, simply because for 1, I've got my my bestfriend who will stickby me through thick and thin, my friends who accept and like me the way I am. And ofcourse last but no least, my home where even though it might not always be the best place to be, its the safest place for me because its just me and me and ME =) I've got nothing to prove to this people because I'm working towards MY diploma to get MY degree and to get MY job. I'm building MY own future and these people are merely passer bys. Those whom IF i remember, I will look back and go "oh yea whatever" WOO I'm feeling SO good right now! ITS THE WEEKEND and thats the sliver lining Let the weekend move by slowly. Let it take its time to embrace every eager soul who awaited it. Let is make every kid happy THEN Let Monday take over and ruin us all again! HAHAHAHAHA Im good! not bad! hahaha Anyways I'll stop for now. Tatas! Might sound crazy but it aint no lie baby BYE BYE BYE! NEW YORK HERE I COME! oh John Abraham is LOVE! I got my glasses in time. Now I can see him all clear. AWESOME =) ·